Had the best night last night with Concubine, Stitch, Penguin, Kindergarten, Brondon and Digin. The Villa was amazing; performing in the amphitheater, acting like goofs in the museum, attacking yummy cakes after gorging on humungo burgers. Taking detours to find a place in the middle of nowhere that carries a certain product that we need. Eating burgers again for dinner and eating frozen yogurt as well. Yelling at the top of our lungs about a dying need for milkshakes, getting dirty looks from random people because we are being obnoxious and loud and disrupting. Going the beach at night, yelling at each other "Don't run off! We don't want you to get raped!" Tackling each other into the sand, straddling a giant cannon and taking pictures. Walking the long stretch of sand to get the water's edge and seeing people having sex and laughing about it. Blasting music in the car and singing at the top of our lungs and setting off car alarms. Over all, one of the best nights ever to be had and enjoyed.
Wake up the next day to find out that the person you love immensely is gone, is missing, and you can't get a hold of them. You don't know if they're okay, you don't know if they're alive, you don't know anything and the worry you feel eats at you and rips you apart. Having them tell you they love you, and that you are the best thing they have in their life and will always cherish you makes the worry worse.
So here I sit, thinking about last night and everything we did, thinking about the one I that is lost to me, but hopefully I'll hear from him and see him soon, and thinking about the fun times we are going to have tonight.
My head is a tornado that is wreaking destruction on everything it touches, causing my emotions to go berserk. My head is spinning, my heart feels like there's an anvil sitting on it with Wil-E Coyote sitting on top of that.
I sit wondering how to act tonight when I'm with all my friends. Do I act all merry and not think about what is bothering me? Do I think about what's bothering me and half-ass my way through the night pretending to be happy?
The saying "Only time will tell" comes to mind, and right now, I hate it.
